Friday, January 23, 2009

An old fool's rant

I had written this a long time ago...dunno why it didnt make it into the blog until now...

"Spirals. And boxes too. That's what they have over on the plateau. Don't be scared. It ain't one of those scary multi coloured spiral infinites. Besides, they have birds too. Those cute fluffy ones - multi-hued and chirpy. The predators are there too but they mostly lurked in the darker hours. Coming back to the point of the spiral, the one I am talking about is nothing like what you are expecting. How do I know what are thinking, I hear you asking. Well, lets just say that yours ain't the first dark mind I am encountering. In fact, dark is a redundant qualifier when it comes to human mind. The organ is so infinitely complex that sooner or later it is bound to churn up a combination of impulses that cross the boundary of what is popularly perceived as sanity. Who defined sanity anyway. It is just another one of those over hyped behavioral assumptions we often make. So don't be offended when I naturally assume that your mind is even now filled with dark psychedelic patterns of spirals zooming in and out. But I assure you, these spirals are different. I cannot quite put it in words. Ever had the most amazing visual in your mind which you couldn't express. Happens all the time? Yeah I've been there as well. Hell, I am there right now for my mind is filled with such rich visuals which I am unable to quite put in words. Its moments like these you realize how uni-dimensional words are. They box your thoughts within grammar, symbols and sequence. Talking of boxes, they have that too over at the plateau. No, no don't be scared, I am not talking about caskets. I am not talking about bunkers as well. But then thinking about it, you may need some bunkers there. Why, you ask me? Well I can see your face twitching with concern. Don't worry, its all good. Bunkers are just for some emergency which will never happen. Its like preparing for a nuclear disaster. You know its never going to come. I should probably talk to the minister about a bunker up there on the plateau. It will be a nice addition to the place - wont spruce up the landscape though. Which brings me back to the boxes. These boxes are basically habitats. Dull looking really but then they are there to serve a purpose and they do that effectively. Purpose is to provide a habitat?, you ask shrugging your shoulders in an understanding of the obvious. I nod wickedly and snicker a little as well. That's impolite isn't it? Well, what can I do.  That's just a habit of mine. Don't interpret it to mean anything else. The boxes are fine. You'll love them.

So what else is there on the plateau, you ask? Well, technically anything. Its pretty dynamic as well. The birds I talked about earlier, they are there all the time. But again, that's only for me and I am kind of a special person out there. I am what you would call an aborigine to the place. But there is so much of negative connotation attached to the word that I am very circumspect in using it. I can see that you have clarity of thought and appear well read as well so I am taking a risk here. Besides birds, there are children and music. For the more vain of you, there are intoxicants and women too. You should try our special drink called the - er ahem. I am not telling you. Whets the charm in telling everything right? There are women who will do things you cant see women do down there on earth. Ah! I see that I have captured your attention at last. That's all right - in my job I have seen many eyes widen with desire.... 'Besides how else will I pull people down there?'....

What? ..no no....I didn't say anything. I see that you are suddenly looking very suspicious. Why,  you offend me you mortal. Don't I look trustworthy? Ask your friends who have known me for quite a while.  I am trustworthy and I say this: come with me to the plateau and I promise you an exciting life. Alright, you say? That's the spirit my boy! Do you want to join right now. I have free membership for the next 50 members - its a very good offer as well when you consider people would pay anything for getting access. I have to tell you this story. There was this lady, pretty charming gal she was with golden skin and blue eyes and a hair that's silky like a  - oh sorry, I drifted out. Where was I? Well, yeah this woman, she was so desperate to get to the plateau and of course, I was charming as ever as well. In any case, she wanted to taste the fruits and smell the air on the plateau that she screwed over her boy friend. She screwed him real good. So bad, it lasted for generations hence forth. But the good thing is she is now in the plateau and having a pretty good time as well. With me you ask? Well, I have moved on. My friend, I am a man with places to go and people to see. Interesting people like yourself to convince you to join me on my journey back to the plateau.

Where is the what? The form? Oh the membership form...yes yes of course, how stupid of me. You are itching to sign up and here I am ranting like an old fool. Well I am an old fool as you would have probably guessed from the way my hands shake as I hand out the pen for you to sign. But that's not just age. I get this way when new people sign up for the plateau. Watching their reaction and emotions when I they arrive is an experience I have been living for. How long? Oh boy, that's a naughty question. But I will forgive your dangerous curiosity and pretend you didn't ask that. Ah! There's your signature. Excellent.

Welcome son. Welcome to Hell. Oh and by the way...you can take your place at that torture capsule over there...."

3 comments:

Slave Of the Dark said...

ur really gettin good at story telling...i like the previous post over this one, even more now, coz its such a huge improvement, given ur admission tht this post was written a long time back...good stuff tragedy

raju said...

@slave - Thanks dude...

I know i suck at structured writing...don't have the discipline or the patience...

btw..this was one of those buzzed-out posts...i had no clue what i was writing :D

Uttara Srinivasan said...

Not yet Asimov but...It's getting there, Ty...Its getting there :P